It was with the fondness and emotion of an American child leaving their beloved summer camp that I took a razor to my bearded face and bode farewell to Stanley Camp this morning. As the hair was washed from the razor and down the plug hole of the basin, I knew that I was washing away not only some poorly grown stubble, but the last of a lifestyle I would not be able to live again until the next time I can afford to spend several days alone in my flat without contacting the outside world. It is a good lifestyle – a sort of scummy version of the one adopted by Howard Hughes, and one day I will return to it. Probably in about a week.
But until that happy time, it was down to work and I had another meeting with the designers of The Project today. I really enjoy these meetings with FortyEight, it’s good to know that even whilst I have been having a weekend doing nothing, they’ve been hard at work trying to secure the success for the idea which means that one day I would actually be acting like Howard Hughes in the penthouse of a Vegas hotel, finger nails and becoming obsessed with germs. It is my greatest wish.
The Project continues to burgeon and expand. I know one thing for sure, I am not clever enough to pull this off. It’s going to need outside help. But as I’ve said on a few occasions now, my naivety and ignorance could act as a powerful force in the short-term. It’s the longer term success that will need a steady hand and acute business mind. A mind that does not exist in my skull. But I’m sure there are loads of businessmen and women who have their own companies, are completely incompetent, but have good people working for them that sort it all out. It might even be common.
Perhaps one day in the future I’ll be able to write a business book available at all airports called ‘Passing The Buck – How To Get Others To Make You Look Brilliant’ which will be a great comfort for other people who are trying to set up a company without the first idea of what they’re doing.
If you have your own company but are a complete idiot, drop me a line and let me know what problems you’ve faced.
Stanley Camp co-insided with a booze hiatus to give my body a break (I’m not an alcoholic but I find it impossible to go to a bar and order a soft drink if others are on harder stuff – it’s against my principals and is poor form on every level) and so staying indoors is the easiest way to lay off, but I was so excited after today’s meeting, on such a high, that I decided to have a glass of red wine in Room to celebrate my luck at having already found competent and intelligent people to get to work on this project. I ended up having two glasses of wine and actually felt tipsy. It’s amazing what just a few days of sobriety can do for you.
I was so tipsy after my two glasses of wine that I made the decision to go and see the Bond movie for the third time. I think seeing it for the third time, without the excitement and pageantry of Bond Day, allowed me to see it in a fairer light. It’s good, but too long by about half an hour, and the third act is the weakest when normally in the Bond film it would be the strongest. But Daniel Craig is still amazing.
My favourite scene, without a shadow of a doubt, comes in a hotel room in Montenegro, just before Bond plays in a £150,000,000 poker game. He is undercover (although he arrogantly checks into the hotel as James Bond, not his arranged name, because, he argues, the villain will already know who he is) and is accompanied by Vesper Lynd, an accountant from the treasury who is looking after the money it’s taken to put Bond into the poker match in the first place. She is also the Bond girl and love interest. They have adjoining rooms. Bond knocks on the door of her bathroom and hangs a fantastic evening dress on the back of the door.
VESPER: You expect me to wear that?
BOND: When you come over tonight and kiss me on the neck I need every player around that table to be looking at your neckline and not at their cards. Do you think you can do that for me?
Vesper nods and goes back to applying mascara whilst Bond exits. He walks into his room and sees an immaculate package on the bed which clearly contains a suit. What do you call the jackets a suit jacket comes in? A suit jacket jacket? Anyway you know what I mean, one of those. And even it, without seeing the suit inside it, looks incredible.
Bond appears back at Vesper’s bathroom door, holding a dinner jacket by its hanger.
BOND: (slightly indignantly) I already have a dinner jacket.
VESPER: There are dinner jackets and there are dinner jackets. This is the latter. I need you look tonight as if you belong at that table.
BOND: (confused) It’s fitted.
VESPER: I sized you up the moment I saw you.
BOND bristles for a brief moment and exits. Cut to Bond’s bathroom, and a pan around to see him standing in front of the mirror in the world’s best tuxedo. Even via a lens, a projector and a screen you can see it’s immaculate. I happen to know it’s made by Brioni and would set you back about £100,000.
Bond looks at himself and you can sense a boyish glee in his new acquisition. He adjusts his bow tie and examines himself closer. Vesper appears at the door and laughs at him. Bond doesn’t mind and continues to stare at his reflection.
I love the scene because the film is about Bond becoming the Bond we know, he’s still something of a rookie, and unlike in the army where you would earn a medal and a new title as you progress, this tuxedo is Bond being awarded Bond status, and he knows it. A brilliant scene. Go see Casino Royale if you’ve not already.
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