My brother Steve has made an excellent lifestyle choice and bought a narrow boat on which he will now live. This is outstanding behaviour and opens up all sorts of possibilities – not least the ability to wake up in a different place every morning. In reality, the boat will be moored in a boat yard 99% of the time but it still affords him the option to travel if he so wanted.
The boat is on the Medway in Tonbridge, Kent, and so to access the canal network he’d have to sail it up to the Thames, through central London, and then onto the Union canal. That would be a fantastic adventure. Imagine chugging up the Thames under Tower Bridge whilst making a pot of tea. We’ve already tentatively planned an expedition this summer which is a thrilling prospect.
It came as a bit of a surprise to me that he’d bought a boat, but then I remember him saying years ago that he’d love to one day. I’m delighted he’s seen this ambition fulfilled, and I’ve absolutely no doubt he’s made a wise move. Boat life’s great! There have been naysayers who’ve argued he’ll freeze in winter and the novelty will wear off but I don’t agree – I think he’ll be extremely cosy in winter and living on a narrow boat is such a unique way of life that it will always be a novelty. There are far more advantages than downsides.
He’s not moved in yet because there’s some work to be done, but should be in residence within a fortnight and then his Rosy And Jim style existence can begin. I suggested he should get a dog (the perfect addition to a boat) but apparently the bloke who manages the boat yard doesn’t allow anyone to have pets. “If I let you have a dog, everyone will want a dog.� He explained. “Then someone will get a cat, then we’ll have a zoo down here.� Steve agreed to comply but then went into the boatyard manager’s office to find two dogs looking at him – the hypocrite. I think he should fight this because anyone who lives on a boat has a dog – that’s an almost sacred rule of boat life. I suppose there’s the problem of having it shut up all day whilst he’s at work… No, I care not for the practicalities, you need a dog.
Steve asked the boatyard manager about renaming his vessel, but apparently this is very bad luck. If you want to rename it, you have to perform a ceremony in which you walk around the edge three times without holding on to anything, or something. Steve’s explanation was a bit sketchy but apparently you’d definitely end up in the drink. I’ve told him that it’s not really important to rename it unless you can think of a brilliant name. Not a funny name, just a great one. Apparently a friend of his, who also has a boat in the yard, ended up living on the water in his nice little boat after nearly getting married and cutting off the engagement at the last minute. His boat is called The Narrow Escape. Perfect.
We were trying to think how long it would take to sail to Liverpool? Between three and four weeks probably, going at a sensible place with plenty of pub stops. Then there’s the journey home so you’d have to free up six to eight weeks. Good God, what a great trip that would be. It would be a summer perfectly spent.
I can completely understand why a lot of people decide to live on boats when they retire. You’ve got the days to yourself, what better way to spend them than chugging up and down the waterways? No council tax, few bills. I imagine there’s an annual cost of keeping the boat in good condition but even so… it’s got to be more economical. It’s what I’ll do when I retire, and so the fact Steve’s done it whilst still about forty years from retirement show’s quite breathtaking foresight. I think he’ll be very happy on the boat and I’ll be visiting in a couple of weeks so I’ll post some photos for us all to enjoy and get envious over.
This also poses the question; What is better – a canal boat or a gin palace? I’d say that despite the luxury cabins, Jacuzzi, powerful engines and sundeck that a gin palace affords one, the canal boat is far better because it’s just pure, undiluted class. Whilst you might deride someone for being showy and rich enough to own a gin palace (probably moored in Monaco), you can never argue with someone who lives on a canal boat. They’re classy and modest at the same time. My brother deciding to live on a boat is borderline genius and I can’t see how it can possibly backfire. I salute him.
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